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Archive for the ‘fear’ Category

Where am I?

Where am I?

By Nina

I’ve travelled far though never left my room
to far off lands of hope and doom

Where monsters thrive and demons dwell
Where Heaven exists alongside Hell

A universe of kings and queens
A world of nightmares and of dreams

Where the sea is red and the sun is white
Where there is no day and there’s only night

One minute, sailing on oceans wide
Next, swooping wings on which I glide

Fearlessly, I’m a warrior brave
from evil tyrants damsels save

Phobia’s faced and put to rest
I deftly complete every quest

Virtual stars of the silver screen
There’s no one thing I haven’t been

Half man, half beast, good or bad
A super hero, sane or mad

And yet in the blinking of an eye
Lose concentration and I die

A mind within a game or a game within a mind
To relive, click ENTER – another life designed

Where am I? I can be anywhere

November 2009

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The Unwanted Visitor

The Unwanted Visitor

by Nina Spink

Through open window seeps poison mist
Snakes invidious from oppressive skies
bleeds over flesh, it exists to creep
to claim its victim as a prize

Life’s stench, born out on trembling lips
Probing finger rips the lies
Dark winged assassin watches
Stands witness to the soul’s demise

Tortured whispers hang on tainted air
pleading with each laboured breath
Uninvited, it brings despair
This visit from The Silent Death

Wretch’d body ravaged by cares of time
bloodshot orbs from sunken sockets stare
battle scarred, offering no resistance
Exposed, decomposed, in full glare

Blood crimson beads of perspiration
freeze in droplets upon the brow
agony contorts once fine features
barely recognizable now

Then burning fevers rage within
all but dead, feint rasping sighs
crazed mind betrays tormented soul
fear screams behind dimmed lifeless eyes

Departing, unannounced as whence it came
The visitor with scant regard
Not this time, is the payment due …. but
Death leaves behind its calling card

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Turmoil

Turmoil
by Nina Spink

There’s a screaming inside your head
Ever present, casting doubt
Is it frustration, fear or passion
Which causes your mind to shout?

There’s an empty space of yearning
A craving from within
A gaping wound, an aching void
Stripped bare beneath the skin

Deep in the pit of your stomach
A pain pierces like a dart
Tears choke back in your throat
It’s a sadness in your heart

There’s a hollow sense of victory
When each day comes to an end
As the steps stretch out in front
The mountain you must still ascend

With heavy limbs and even heavier heart
You climb the thirteen stairs
You fall into bed, switch off the light
But neglect to say your prayers

No respite comes, as hours tick by
Shadows swirl in unconscious stream
Secrets swim in nightmares caught
To drown in restless dream

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Captivity

Captivity

by Nina Spink

I can’t bear to be here anymore
It’s been a grave mistake
What started as a home of love
Has now turned into hate

I feel the handcuffs chafing
And the chains no longer stretch
To the window where I’d look out
On the beauty just out of reach

The walls are closing in
On my sterile padded cell
The straight jacket binds me fast
In my corner where I dwell

The window now dark and dingy
Through which the sun no longer shines
Into this love forsaken hell hole
Wherein I am confined

What happened to our garden
I never saw it spoil
What had blossomed in the Summer
had died upon the Fall

This oppressive silence stifles
Here I can hardly breathe
If I don’t escape this prison now
I know I’ll never leave

I’m pleading for this broken heart
You only hold the key
That opens up this bolted door
Unlock and set me free

To feel the wind upon my pallid face
Oh! what I wouldn’t give
To spread my wings and fly away
Once more …. begin to live

Note: Can’t make up my mind whether to switch the last two verses round …..

Thanks …. yes I think so too – have swapped them round now. Thanks Miss D.

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Life’s Storms

by Nina Spink


This raging storm inside my head
When will it ever subside
It’s been raining here so very long
a prisoner kept inside

Confusion confines me on every side
whichever door I’d take
leads onto vast gaping ravines
made during life’s earthquake

Respite offered but fleetingly
upon each transient breeze
Yet all too soon to disappear
Serves only there to tease

Still thunder roars within my mind
each searing lightning flash
dark secrets for a moment glimpsed
Expose the aching gash

A wounded soul in search of rest
Yet nowhere can it find
Safe haven from the incessant storm
it wanders bruised and blind

Swirling winds grasp, taking hold
attempt its will to break
drags down the soul then spews it out
left shattered in its wake

In the aftermath of each gale
silence once more does screech
Within the smashed and tattered mind
Peace hangs … just out of reach

So tempting just to close ones eyes
give up, then peeling back
the fingers of life’s vice like grip
Let go, no turning back

Still something stirs within the depths
that urges to remain
pick up the pieces of shattered dreams
to weather life’s storm again

With tentative yet shaky steps
the fragile soul, fear filled
Battered, broken by the hurricane
determined to rebuild

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Dreams Darkest Hour

Dreams Darkest Hour

by Nina Spink


I thirst under the relenting sun
There is but dust to drink
My tears evaporate in the heat

hyenas hem me in on every side
They snap at my ankles
They wait for me to fall

My bones barely a meal
They gather to devour
To sustain their power over me

They laugh and tease
Spiteful screams that freeze the blood
Fear holds me immovable

Dark clouds hang over me
Blocking my vision
I hold my head in anguish

Where are my friends?
I have no friends
I am alone and frightened

I cry, heart rending sobs
I have no tears
They turn to salt

In my shame I call out for help
desolate and exposed
I do not want to die – I am not ready

Who will hear me in this God forsaken world
that I have made for myself
Which I have exploited

Coldness stiffens my limbs
Darkness spreads over me as a cloak
Enveloping me

Its icy fingers burn my skin
The pain is intolerable
I scream demanding Death to come take me

No release. I am borne up into the sky
Held within a freezing grip
My skin is raw, my nerves uncovered

I remain for what seems an eternity
safe from those that seek me harm
Cool air soothes my pain

I awake to a darkened room
Fire embers barely glow
ghostly shadows play upon the walls
sinking back into the dark world of dreams.

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