Posts Tagged ‘fear’

Speak Peace to my Heart

Speak Peace to my Heart
by Nina Spink

Speak peace to my heart and hold me fast
Until the morning, and the night is past.
Within your arms keep me safe from harm
Close and loved, soft and warm.

Keep me close, tell me it’ll be ok
Give me strength to endure another day
Hold me steady, don’t let me go
Love me now, the whole night through.


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by Nina Spink

There’s a screaming inside your head
Ever present, casting doubt
Is it frustration, fear or passion
Which causes your mind to shout?

There’s an empty space of yearning
A craving from within
A gaping wound, an aching void
Stripped bare beneath the skin

Deep in the pit of your stomach
A pain pierces like a dart
Tears choke back in your throat
It’s a sadness in your heart

There’s a hollow sense of victory
When each day comes to an end
As the steps stretch out in front
The mountain you must still ascend

With heavy limbs and even heavier heart
You climb the thirteen stairs
You fall into bed, switch off the light
But neglect to say your prayers

No respite comes, as hours tick by
Shadows swirl in unconscious stream
Secrets swim in nightmares caught
To drown in restless dream

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by Nina Spink

I can’t bear to be here anymore
It’s been a grave mistake
What started as a home of love
Has now turned into hate

I feel the handcuffs chafing
And the chains no longer stretch
To the window where I’d look out
On the beauty just out of reach

The walls are closing in
On my sterile padded cell
The straight jacket binds me fast
In my corner where I dwell

The window now dark and dingy
Through which the sun no longer shines
Into this love forsaken hell hole
Wherein I am confined

What happened to our garden
I never saw it spoil
What had blossomed in the Summer
had died upon the Fall

This oppressive silence stifles
Here I can hardly breathe
If I don’t escape this prison now
I know I’ll never leave

I’m pleading for this broken heart
You only hold the key
That opens up this bolted door
Unlock and set me free

To feel the wind upon my pallid face
Oh! what I wouldn’t give
To spread my wings and fly away
Once more …. begin to live

Note: Can’t make up my mind whether to switch the last two verses round …..

Thanks …. yes I think so too – have swapped them round now. Thanks Miss D.

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Fall From Grace

Fall From Grace
Nina Spink

You held me safe, or so I thought
Within your care my soul there caught
You glanced away ’twas then I fell
Swiftly descending into a hell
on earth with no way out
No one to hear me when I shout
for help; “rescue me”, I called in vain
left to languish in timeless pain

A soul discarded, thrown away
Abandoned, cast out to decay
In blackest fear I there remained
Alone within my thoughts was chained
and bound without hope of release
A banished mind devoid of peace
To ponder on what might have been
If my fall you had foreseen

Then at my lowest ebb you came
To lift me up, forgive my blame
For it was not into my ear
you whispered to allay my fear
Your saving words fell upon my heart
and kissed my soul with lips apart
Broken, bruised, ripped and torn
Safe to your bosom this soul was borne

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Life’s Storms

by Nina Spink

This raging storm inside my head
When will it ever subside
It’s been raining here so very long
a prisoner kept inside

Confusion confines me on every side
whichever door I’d take
leads onto vast gaping ravines
made during life’s earthquake

Respite offered but fleetingly
upon each transient breeze
Yet all too soon to disappear
Serves only there to tease

Still thunder roars within my mind
each searing lightning flash
dark secrets for a moment glimpsed
Expose the aching gash

A wounded soul in search of rest
Yet nowhere can it find
Safe haven from the incessant storm
it wanders bruised and blind

Swirling winds grasp, taking hold
attempt its will to break
drags down the soul then spews it out
left shattered in its wake

In the aftermath of each gale
silence once more does screech
Within the smashed and tattered mind
Peace hangs … just out of reach

So tempting just to close ones eyes
give up, then peeling back
the fingers of life’s vice like grip
Let go, no turning back

Still something stirs within the depths
that urges to remain
pick up the pieces of shattered dreams
to weather life’s storm again

With tentative yet shaky steps
the fragile soul, fear filled
Battered, broken by the hurricane
determined to rebuild

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Buried Dreams

by Nina Spink

To look upon the day so bright
With eyes transfixed in darkest night
The restless soul would linger long
To catch a glimpse of times bygone
And with the advent of each day
In warmest dreams would choose to stay.

But trick oneself should err remain
In desperate need relieve such pain
And yet with dread, would fear to stay
Wherein the shrieking shadows play
Upon the recess of the mind
Of thoughts guilt-ridden oft to bind.

And heady pleasures as recalled
Throw smiles upon the soul enthralled
Yet yearnings so intense prolong
a deepest need denied so strong
As with the keeness of a knife
To cut away this faulted life

With fleeting glance to azure sky
to view the skylark flying high
soon disappears from sight above
reminiscent of a long lost love
Expose the wound with stab of pain
Quick thoughts return to earth again

And so does search with envious eye
And inward wish for wings to fly
Away from this tumultuous place
And feel again that warm embrace
But knowing this could never be
A love which ne’er belonged to thee

With melancholy and aching heart
Tears wet upon the cheeks do smart
And silent sobs within the breast
Of hankerings devoid of rest
Deny the drowning soul safe stream
to close ones eyes, once more to dream.

Nina Spink
April 2009

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Damaged Goods

by Nina Spink

Under cover of night, shadows steal,

disfigured and lame, two damaged worlds meet,
taking shelter within each others wounds.
Shielded from harm, a temporary respite.
The pain and hurt carried deep within,
parcelled and neatly ribboned,
masking the grotesque of the memories inside,
the resulting scars fleetingly glimpsed .

Toxins released in the inevitable purge,
disfigured and tortured, the soul emerges,
war weary and battle scarred.
Vulnerable and fragile stands naked,
quaking, distrustfully and emotionally shredded.

Slowly, apprehensively as a child taking first steps,
reaching out to a kindred mind, to be guided, encouraged.

The dark and frayed canvass gives way to a bright many faceted mural,
bejeweled grass trapping the morning sun
offering warmth and energy to the weary soul.
Therein lies hope of a new day,
a clean slate, devoid of the baggage of the night before.

Hovering clouds disturbed by the Autumn breeze,
breathes new life,
A promise of clearer days ahead,
beckoning new pastures, ripe fruits for the plucking.
A re-balance of the distortion in prior years of
the desolate barren land of backbreaking
that stretched far behind into the distant past,
kept prisoner within ones mind
Where only Straight jacketed days extended endlessly ahead.

Now, the gold horizon ever tempting in its infinity,
sends whispers to caress the heart and stroke tired limbs.
Therein lies a promise of self worth and purpose just for the taking.
Fear and trepidation ….bravely …. nervously
I stumble forward to grasp.

Nina Spink

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